The Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor is a man who appreciates the small things in life. We believe that it is the little things that make life so enjoyable. A giggle of a small child, birds chirping on a spring day, a lazy afternoon when you can nap in a warm breeze, McDonalds dollar menu, finding a quarter on the ground. These are all wonderful things; however they pale in comparison to the majesty of the 44oz Diet Mountain Dew.
Many a lousy day has reversed in character due to the intervention of this glorious liquid. Yet universal forces often intervene in the smooth process of purchasing and imbibing in the aforementioned liquid. Woe a many of days when the PSBE goes to his preferred filling station (it’s the cheapest) and they are either out of the green deliciousness or they are in the process of replacing the tank. Knowing that his favorite beverage has to be the beverage of choice of all State Controlled Media followers, the PSBE understands that this interruption is going to happen from time to time.
No, this is not the sickening, abhorrent, loathsome act that inspired this post. This is dedicated to the vile human who often gets to the soda fountain just before the PSBE. This person dumps whatever is left of the homemade brew they were drinking into the overflow basin in order to fill up there cup with Diet Pepsi (we only assume it is Diet Pepsi as that is the most vile drink in existence so this person must be drinking that). We know it was homemade as no reputable establishment sells ice-cubes made like that and the liquid clinging to the disfigured cubes seems to be some hellish coffee-Pepsi-milk-vomit blend.
This person could dump their putrid concoction in the sink provided to the left of the soda dispenser or in the trashcan outside or in the bushes next to the facility or anywhere in the mother gia loving Earth. But no, they have to pour it right where the offending vapors (of the beverage of choice of Satan) and pierce the nasal cavity of the PSBE and take away the enjoyment of the most wonderful beverage in existence.
Whoever you are we say to you…BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
