Update People who did us wrong: Branson edition

A contributing editor made a haiku in honor of the toast post:

Made toast for the girls
Old lady took it away
Must make toast again

Your Daily Binary

01001100 01100101 01100001 01110010 01101110 00100000 01100110 01110010 01101111 01101101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110111 01100101 01100001 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100000 00101110 00100000 00101110 00100000 00101110 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100000 01110000 01100001 01111001 01110011 00100000 01101110 01101111 00100000 01100001 01110100 01110100 01100101 01101110 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100011 01110010 01101001 01110100 01101001 01100011 01101001 01110011 01101101 00101110 00001101 00001010

People Who Did us Wrong: Branson Edition

Overall we thought the People of the City of Branson were polite and helpful. The visitors to the fine city were a mixed bag though. Some instances were plain rudeness (like old people cutting in lines), some were strange or surreal (like the teen boy leaning on the Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor), and one incident in particular was both. A B!t@H stole our toast. We were at our hotel and the Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor was making raisin toast for daughter #1. An elderly lady walked up and took the toast from the toaster and walked away...while smiling at us! I mean what the hell? Its not like there was not a loaf of bread right there. I guess that with so few hours left on Earth she could not stand to wait the time it took to to toast bread...we hope you are happy with your purloined

toast, we hope it did not taste bitter and was hard to swallow with all that sadness and regret that it was buttered with.

Caught Reading SCM

You never Know where we might pop up!

From the Desk of the Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor

Get to Know Your SCM Editors

Telling you what to eat, Branson edition...

Mrs. Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor and daughter Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor #’s 1 and 2 enjoyed a giant cinnamon roll in Silver Dollar City. This Cinnamon roll was so enticing that while we waited for Mother Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor to get her electric scooter (more on that later) it seemed every 5^th person stopped, smelling the aroma coming from the bakery and said “Oh, that smells good.” So we thought about telling you if you do nothing else drive, fly, boat or hitchhike to Branson to try these. That is until the Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor spotted this:

It is common knowledge that Éclairs are a superior form of all pastries but the fine folks at Eva & Delilah's Bakery have taken it to a new level. It has Custard and whipped cream! Just look at it…LOOK AT IT! What else do we have to say?

Your daily Binary

00100010 01001001 00100111 01110110 01100101 00100000 01101100 01100101 01100001 01110010 01101110 01100101 01100100 00100000 01101010 01110101 01110011 01110100 00100000 01100101 01101110 01101111 01110101 01100111 01101000 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01101101 01101001 01110011 01110001 01101111 01110101 01110100 01100101 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100010 00100000 01001100 01101111 01110010 01100100 00100000 01000010 01111001 01110010 01101111 01101110

SCM Propaganda

Our new add campaign!

SCM ROAD TRIPPIN...

We at State Controlled Media took a road trip this past weekend, we went to Branson Missouri. Those of you unfamiliar with Branson let us get you up to speed.  Branson is the entertainment capitol of the Ozarks. It is where has-beens and never-was’ go to entertain. So why wouldn’t we want to go? It is the home Of Silver Dollar City. This is a theme park that recreates authentic Ozark living from a century ago. You would have to travel hundreds of…feet to see this style of living once you leave the park.  We were there to view the authentic Christmas displays (it is November) in the park and our hotel (which had a castle theme, and had a pirate room!) We will break down the trip into different segments to detail our adventure in the Ozarks. It may sound like we are mocking the experience but we really had a good time. Those on the trip include the Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor, Mrs. Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor, Mother Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor and daughter Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor #’s 1 and 2. More to come…

SCM TIP

I was working as a greeter at my favorite box store when a woman came up to me as she was leaving. her hands were full with at least a dozen shopping bags and she made the comment: "what would we do with out automatic doors?" This always gets my goat. I am going to say this once and I want to be perfectly clear; there are no such things as automatic doors, there are just polite ninjas. Please give credit where credit is due.

Your Evil Binary

01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100100 01100101 01110100 01100001 01101001 01101100 01110011 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01101101 01111001 00100000 01101100 01101001 01100110 01100101 00100000 01100001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01110001 01110101 01101001 01110100 01100101 00100000 01101001 01101110 01100011 01101111 01101110 01110011 01100101 01110001 01110101 01100101 01101110 01110100 01101001 01100001 01101100 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100000 01110110 01100101 01110010 01111001 00100000 01110111 01100101 01101100 01101100 00101100 00100000 01110111 01101000 01100101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100100 01101111 00100000 01001001 00100000 01100010 01100101 01100111 01101001 01101110 00111111 00100000 01001101 01111001 00100000 01100110 01100001 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110111 01100001 01110011 00100000 01100001 00100000 01110010 01100101 01101100 01100101 01101110 01110100 01101100 01100101 01110011 01110011 01101100 01111001 00100000 01110011 01100101 01101100 01100110 00101101 01101001 01101101 01110000 01110010 01101111 01110110 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01100010 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100001 01101110 01100111 01100101 01110010 01101001 01100101 00100000 01101111 01110111 01101110 01100101 01110010 00100000 01100110 01110010 01101111 01101101 00100000 01000010 01100101 01101100 01100111 01101001 01110101 01101101 00100000 01110111 01101001 01110100 01101000 00100000 01101100 01101111 01110111 00100000 01100111 01110010 01100001 01100100 01100101 00100000 01101110 01100001 01110010 01100011 01101111 01101100 01100101 01110000 01110011 01111001 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01100001 00100000 01110000 01100101 01101110 01100011 01101000 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01100010 01110101 01100111 01100111 01100101 01110010 01111001 00101110 00100000 01001101 01111001 00100000 01101101 01101111 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110111 01100001 01110011 00100000 01100001 00100000 01100110 01101001 01100110 01110100 01100101 01100101 01101110 00100000 01111001 01100101 01100001 01110010 00100000 01101111 01101100 01100100 00100000 01000110 01110010 01100101 01101110 01100011 01101000 00100000 01110000 01110010 01101111 01110011 01110100 01101001 01110100 01110101 01110100 01100101 00100000 01101110 01100001 01101101 01100101 01100100 00100000 01000011 01101000 01101100 01101111 01100101 00100000 01110111 01101001 01110100 01101000 00100000 01110111 01100101 01100010 01100010 01100101 01100100 00100000 01100110 01100101 01100101 01110100 00101110 00100000 01001101 01111001 00100000 01100110 01100001 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110111 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100100 00100000 01110111 01101111 01101101 01100001 01101110 01101001 01111010 01100101 00101100 00100000 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110111 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100100 00100000 01100100 01110010 01101001 01101110 01101011 00101110 00100000 01001000 01100101 00100000 01110111 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100100 00100000 01101101 01100001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01101111 01110101 01110100 01110010 01100001 01100111 01100101 01101111 01110101 01110011 00100000 01100011 01101100 01100001 01101001 01101101 01110011 00100000 01101100 01101001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101001 01101110 01110110 01100101 01101110 01110100 01100101 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110001 01110101 01100101 01110011 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 00100000 01101101 01100001 01110010 01101011 00101110 00100000 01010011 01101111 01101101 01100101 01110100 01101001 01101101 01100101 01110011 00100000 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110111 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100100 00100000 01100001 01100011 01100011 01110101 01110011 01100101 00100000 01100011 01101000 01100101 01110011 01110100 01101110 01110101 01110100 01110011 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01100010 01100101 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01101100 01100001 01111010 01111001 00101110 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110011 01101111 01110010 01110100 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01100111 01100101 01101110 01100101 01110010 01100001 01101100 00100000 01101101 01100001 01101100 01100001 01101001 01110011 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01101111 01101110 01101100 01111001 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100111 01100101 01101110 01101001 01110101 01110011 00100000 01110000 01101111 01110011 01110011 01100101 01110011 01110011 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101001 01101110 01110011 01100001 01101110 01100101 00100000 01101100 01100001 01101101 01100101 01101110 01110100 00101110 00100000 01001101 01111001 00100000 01100011 01101000 01101001 01101100 01100100 01101000 01101111 01101111 01100100 00100000 01110111 01100001 01110011 00100000 01110100 01111001 01110000 01101001 01100011 01100001 01101100 00101110 00100000 01010011 01110101 01101101 01101101 01100101 01110010 01110011 00100000 01101001 01101110 00100000 01010010 01100001 01101110 01100111 01101111 01101111 01101110 00101100 00100000 01101100 01110101 01100111 01100101 00100000 01101100 01100101 01110011 01110011 01101111 01101110 01110011 00101110 00100000 01001001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110011 01110000 01110010 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110111 01100101 00100111 01100100 00100000 01101101 01100001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01101101 01100101 01100001 01110100 00100000 01101000 01100101 01101100 01101101 01100101 01110100 01110011 00101110 00100000 01010111 01101000 01100101 01101110 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01110011 00100000 01101001 01101110 01110011 01101111 01101100 01100101 01101110 01110100 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01110011 00100000 01110000 01101100 01100001 01100011 01100101 01100100 00100000 01101001 01101110 00100000 01100001 00100000 01100010 01110101 01110010 01101100 01100001 01110000 00100000 01100010 01100001 01100111 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01100010 01100101 01100001 01110100 01100101 01101110 00100000 01110111 01101001 01110100 01101000 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100101 01100100 01110011 00101101 00100000 01110000 01110010 01100101 01110100 01110100 01111001 00100000 01110011 01110100 01100001 01101110 01100100 01100001 01110010 01100100 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100001 01101100 01101100 01111001 00101110 00100000 01000001 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100001 01100111 01100101 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01110100 01110111 01100101 01101100 01110110 01100101 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100011 01100101 01101001 01110110 01100101 01100100 00100000 01101101 01111001 00100000 01100110 01101001 01110010 01110011 01110100 00100000 01110011 01100011 01110010 01101001 01100010 01100101 00101110 00100000 01000001 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100001 01100111 01100101 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110101 01110010 01110100 01100101 01100101 01101110 00100000 01100001 00100000 01011010 01101111 01110010 01101111 01100001 01110011 01110100 01110010 01101001 01100001 01101110 00100000 01101110 01100001 01101101 01100101 01100100 00100000 01010110 01101001 01101100 01101101 01100001 00100000 01110010 01101001 01110100 01110101 01100001 01101100 01101001 01110011 01110100 01101001 01100011 01100001 01101100 01101100 01111001 00100000 01110011 01101000 01100001 01110110 01100101 01100100 00100000 01101101 01111001 00100000 01110100 01100101 01110011 01110100 01101001 01100011 01101100 01100101 01110011 00101110 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100001 01101100 01101100 01111001 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110100 01101000 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01101100 01101001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01100001 00100000 01110011 01101000 01101111 01110010 01101110 00100000 01110011 01100011 01110010 01101111 01110100 01110101 01101101 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100111 01110011 00100000 01100010 01110010 01100101 01100001 01110100 01101000 01110100 01100001 01101011 01101001 01101110 01100111 00101101 00100000 01001001 00100000 01101000 01101001 01100111 01101000 01101100 01111001 00100000 01110011 01110101 01100111 01100111 01100101 01110011 01110100 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110100 01110010 01111001 00100000 01101001 01110100 00101110 00100000 00001101 00001010 00001101 00001010

SCM Propaganda

 

We Can't do it alone! We are limited in intellect and talent and we need YOU to get ideas to us for the blog. Some of you have contributed most of you have failed us: read, contribute, produce...don't make this harder than it has to be.

Another Reason Dogs are Better Than Cats...

Cats are Freaking SPAWN CAMPERS!

Chupacabra...We don't think so!

For background check out THIS STORY
Ordinarily we at State Controlled Media ignore these types of stories. We think they detract form the serious stories we make up. However since this one originated so close to SCM headquarters and we were vacationing in the area at the time we felt it needed to be addressed. A pair of hunters near Springfield Missouri (Home to corporate Jesus) took down this creature:

They claim it is the legendary chupacabra. That would be a cool story; but since we didn't make it up report it first. We evaluated it closely and it is clear what this is:

A hellhound! We tried to warn you EARLIER now we have proof.

Your Dialy Binary

01000010 01100101 01110100 01110100 01100101 01110010 00100000 01100010 01111001 00100000 01100110 01100001 01110010 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110011 01101000 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100100 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 01100111 01100101 01110100 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110011 01101101 01101001 01101100 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110011 01101000 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100100 00100000 01110010 01100101 01101101 01100101 01101101 01100010 01100101 01110010 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01100010 01100101 00100000 01110011 01100001 01100100 00101110 00001101 00001010 00001101 00001010

00111010 00101000