Ordinarily we at State Controlled Media ignore these types of stories. We think they detract form the serious stories we make up. However since this one originated so close to SCM headquarters and we were vacationing in the area at the time we felt it needed to be addressed. A pair of hunters near Springfield Missouri (Home to corporate Jesus) took down this creature:
They claim it is the legendary chupacabra. That would be a cool story; but since we didn't make it up report it first. We evaluated it closely and it is clear what this is:
