What We Learned Today...

With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine.

Your Daily Binary Inspiration

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We have a vision…

      

We have a vision of the world where a Chicken can cross the road without having its motives questioned.

While we are at it; why is it when a priest, a rabbi and minister/shaman/Islamic cleric/dalai lama/duck walk into a bar they are not praised for their ability to put their differences aside and imbibe instead of being exploited for petty entertainment?

When will we learn not to exploit the innocent actions of others for our own amusement?

State Controlled Media TIP

English can be difficult, here are some examples:

The bandage was wound around the wound.
The farm was used to produce produce.
The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
He could lead if he would get the lead out.
The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
They were too close to the door to close it.
The buck does funny things when the does are present.
To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
After a number of injections my jaw got number.
Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

If you don't believe me go ghoti!

Your Daily Binary Inspiration

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Supernatural Awareness Month

Little did you know but we at State Controlled Media have declared October as Supernatural Awareness Month. For the rest of this month we will be posting tips on how to deal with specters, ghouls, monsters of all sorts and annoying neighbors.

As we always say preparedness is key for survival of any situation so pay special attention. To save space for future posts here are a few items that come in handy:

-Holy water; an all-purpose supernatural repellant. Think what Drakkar Noir does for super models. Also it is just water and all emergency situations require water.

-Cross; Regardless of your religious affiliation, all spirits and monsters are afraid of Christians (asking them to go to a barbecues or attend church on Sunday). They are especially afraid of Catholics…you understand.

-UV spotlight, all evil is put off by light and these bright lights can incapacitate or even kill some supernatural ghouls. Eye protection is a must! A decent one will cost you around $125 but it is worth it as when you are not fighting the evil dead you can tan with it.

-Silver Bullets; Most creatures of the night can be dispatched with regular bullets but why take a chance? Some creatures require silver to do the deed and even though it is more expensive…safety first. (A contributing editor pointed out that I should remind everyone that not only do you need a gun to shoot the bullets but the bullet should match the gun. If you don’t know what I mean then happy hunting!)                                       

-Mirror; most creatures of the night despise looking at themselves. Worst case scenario you can hit them with it. (Note: almost all mirrors have silver in them!)

This would be a good starter kit to fend off all supernatural pesky problems. It is doubly effective against troublesome neighbors. In case of a neighbor problem you can use substitutions: a hose instead of holy water; a club instead of cross (though if a neighbor believes you are a holy roller and they are not the will stay away; however if your neighbor is a holy roller a cross will only increase your attraction), UV spotlight work well if you have a peeping tom or you want to temporarily blind them, regular bullets will do the trick and last keep the mirror. If all else fails the mirror will show your neighbor what a douche they are being.

Stay tuned for part 2: Vampires and you...

A tale of two cerebral cortex

It has been proven scientifically that men and women have brains that function differently. I know shocker, right? Factor in environmental and sociological stressors and the void grows. The purpose of this epistle is not to point by point delineate the differences in the male and female brain; instead it is to draw upon a pop culture reference to illustrate, in a metaphorical sense, personality variations. It came to me in a light discussion with co-workers.

The pop culture reference I am going to use is That 70’s Show. The men of the show represent the men of real life and the women do the same. When I say that I don’t mean to infer that one single character represents any one person. No, I say that this show’s characters taken together reproduce the psyche of either sex. This is part one of a three part expose that will break down the differences in the sexes based on the static characters in That 70’s Show. Most of the times these characters operate separate from each other and deal with the morass of their lives occasionally the characters come together to confab in the “circle” in this aspect you can see how the mind operates in conjunction with the various conflictions we all have. Stay tuned...