(editor note: We know the picture above is Mardi Gras which is not Lent but it falls in the irony of this missive.)
We at State Controlled Media do not subscribe to any particular religion. Each of us has our own sets of beliefs and we refuse to set a standard for the site. That being said this is a major event for a large portion of the populace. So we researched it (i.e. we asked people we know) and we were dissatisfied with what we found out. What exactly can you eat for Lent? The topic registered to us this way; we were on a SCM road trip and the Perpetual Supreme Benevolent Editor was hungry. Every where he looked fast food restaurants proclaimed the arrival of one type of fish sandwich or another. So the PSBE asked: “why the influx in fish?” A Catholic member of SCm informed us that it is common to give up eating meat for Lent.
“Why?” asked the PSBE.
“It’s about sacrifice,” answered the Holy Editor. “Besides fasting believers are asked to prey more and give up something important or take on extra work.”
PSBE: “Like starting a blog?”
Holy Editor: “No, it’s not like that at all.”
PSBE: “I don’t get it, fasting and sacrifice for belivers…
Holy Editor: “And abstinence.”
PSBE: “Abstinence?”
Holy Editor: “Yup.”
PSBE: “Eww.”
Holy Editor: “Yup.”
PSBE: “So, how does fast food fish figure into abstinence, fasting, and sacrifice?”
Holy Editor: “well we have to fast from meat and we can eat fish, it really has no bearing on those other things.”
PSBE: “you can EAT fish during Lent?”
Holy Editor: “Yup.”
The rest of the conversation is not germane to our larger point and has been redacted by the PSBE (i.e. he spent the next several minutes berating people who believed fish was not meat. Looking at you vegetarians.) So we did more research (looked Lent up on Wikipedia). The history of Lent is not oimportnat but we found that the point about eating fish is derived from St. Thomas Aquinas said about meat: "they afford greater pleasure as food [than fish], and greater nourishment to the human body, so that from their consumption there results a greater surplus available for seminal matter, which when abundant becomes a great incentive to lust."
So the whole point in eating fish and fasting is no sex…
No sex=fasting, abstinence AND sacrifice. When Lent first started there was no candy bars to give up or Xbox. So abstinence was the thing to give up. We believe that the prevalence of you people giving up anything and everything you can think of for Lent is proof you have not, nor do you intend to, adhere to the abstinence thing. So if you are not going to do the abstinence thing there is no need to eat only fish…right?
Anyway, so when we thought about this process further we decided you should be eating this:
and This:
Not This:
We don’t think changing your order slightly at a fast food place is sacrifice nor does it make you less likely to have carnal relations with your spouse/random person. If indeed this:
… is just as acceptable as this:
And you dnaon’t have to eat this:
...none stop. Then you can all up your preying to Jesus to thank him for this:
Your Friends at State Controlled Media
